This is a good starting point to understand self-confidence, why some have it and others don’t, why it is not easily obtained, especially for those suffering from fear and anxiety greatly in the course of their day. Nothing erodes self-confidence more than inner fear, especially when the cause is not known so there are no useful actions one can think of to help one’s plight. Where do you turn? What action do you take to seek safety, find higher ground, or shelter from a hazard that is looming if there is no awareness of its nature, its cause, what might happen, and what form it might appear? This is the insidious consequence of fear and anxiety when it has no name or face. Even when that might be assumed, it might be assumed in error, thinking that one’s opponent is a greater foe but really is a projection of a large amount of inner fear with no conscious awareness of the real cause being assumed due to a concern based on reason and logic, that one must interact with someone disliked or there is an ongoing competition of some kind, as in coworkers vying for a promotion competing with one another, or an underling who has been heavily criticized and fearing the worst in the next encounter with the boss, and on and on.
In almost any kind of human relationships where there is an uneven balance of power, it is an invitation to stir up fear and anxiety. Sometimes, while often on the part of the underling, it can be triggered in an overseer as well because that responsibility has deep karmic implications and the deep subconscious is aware of the possibility of losing power, having something go wrong, and to be blamed, and losing authority and losing face as a consequence, and perhaps never recover. Taking risks is a frequent source of fear and anxiety and that is a requisite for leadership, so leaders are not among the happiest of people, principally for this reason, that it is stressful. The more that is at stake with the size of the leadership role, the greater the risks assumed, the greater the fall will be if they are knocked off their pedestal by events and they are blamed for poor judgment, poor tactics, and strategy. In essence, the role and function of the leader setting things in motion and sometimes dictating policy, and certainly being a key decider about alternatives and will accordingly be blamed for any failure, at least to some extent.
So the experiencing of fear and anxiety are almost universal. When absent, one must be in either of the extreme poles of someone who is very much in alignment with the divine, having supreme confidence in the self and one’s personal standing and power and reach, or at the other extreme, being disconnected from the higher self and not receiving any warnings or any guidance about overreaching, and in the absence of a flow of love, which creates inner acceptance and stability and gives one the wherewithal to interact effectively with fellow humans, all one is left with is the ego and that is a fragile being and it requires lots of care and feeding, but in the end will be a quite arbitrary representation of the true person and will often miscalculate and carry out erratic and exaggerated behavior with the intention to serve the self without concern to others or the greater enterprise one is a part of. The level of uncertainty learned through hard-won experience for such individuals can leave them very fragile. This is why such individuals may fly into a rage when challenged, because it is an outsized threat to them given that they have no anchor within, no inner love for anything beyond the self, and not enough love for the self either to give them comfort and stability. Love is the ultimate answer for the lack of self-confidence and that will be impossible to gain for the narcissist and the sociopath.